Are you Hungry for some Games?

Okay, so I know I’m a little bit behind on this, but I just started reading The Hunger Games series.

Over a year ago, my sister was telling me that I had to read them and I just ignored it…I was too busy writing my senior thesis. Well, I finally got around to it yesterday and I’ve already finished the first book..no shit. Amazing. Go read it if you haven’t already.

They’re making it into a movie, too, in case you just joined the world today. Who’s excited now? Yep. Me.

A moment of clarity.

It’s funny how a book can alter your state of mind. Given my last post, it’s pretty obvious that I left my house today in a bit of an irritated frenzy. I left with with a book in hand, music in my ear, and 5 euros in my pocket. I ended up at Aran Haus, my choice coffee shop here in Rosenheim. This became my set-up for the next 2 1/2 hours.

From the moment I began reading this book a few days ago, I knew it would have an effect on me. The first paragraph of the prologue sent chills down my spine and through each limb. De Rossi’s memoir recounts her battle with anorexia and bulimia, and her struggle to accept herself in every way. Her tale is a powerful and raw one. If I had had the time, I could easily have read this book cover to cover in one sitting. It’s that compelling. When I sat down in Aran Haus, I had half of the book left and was feeling rather restless. Before I knew it, I had been at Aran for 2 1/2 hours, devouring each word. I figured it was time for a change of scenery. I needed a good place to sit and think. So I went to the park.

In the park, I probably sat for another hour, thinking and writing in my journal. I gained perspective on things that are totally unrelated to eating disorders and body image. I think that everyone must have some sort of struggle, and hers just made mine seem so much clearer in that moment. At this point, I still had about 60 pages left, so I decided that I would finish it. In completing Unbearable Lightness, I acquired a brand new sense of life. There are so many pressures in this world, so many rules to abide by and expectations that we feel we must meet. But the most important thing to experience is happiness. We cannot change who we are to seem more acceptable to others. We are acceptable just the way we are. The trick is accepting yourself first. Happiness comes with taking time to enjoy the good things in life, like nature, the arts, helping others, and being true to who you are. There is no need to dwell on the bad, and you must not feel guilty for doing what is right for you.

Needless to say, I walked away from that park with a sense of peace. I needed a fresh perspective, and that is what this book gave me. I truly believe that everyone should read it. It has provided me with hope that the future will only improve, that people can change, and that the best thing a person can do is be honest and true to him/herself.

Some of the things I’m missing.

As I mentioned in my previous post, it is October 1st. Today came the realization that it is definitely Fall. And that’s when the nostalgia came knocking at my door.

My first sign that Autumn has arrived is always just a feeling. The sensation that all is calm in the world. Leaves are falling, children are playing, and American football is starting. This usually occurs to me on a mid to late September Sunday morning, driving through my neighborhood on a clear, breezy day (except, of course, when I was at school..there it would strike me as I walked to class in a light zip up jacket). When I parked my car in my driveway, I would stand and look up at the sky, thanking the universe for giving me such a pure sense of my surroundings. Walking into my house ensured the constant football games on TV all day, which is always a pleasure, and a true staple of Fall in America. The promise of a big family dinner later on that day was comforting. Now, I’m somewhere completely different, and it just isn’t the same. It is still nice, but I’m longing for that moment when all things fall perfectly into place (haha get it..”fall” into place).

I’m also missing midterms. I know how ridiculous that sounds. Who wants to study for hours on end, just to figure out you’ve studied all the wrong things and then have to pray for the best? Frankly, I do. And not because I love spending time reading the same thing over and over again, but because I love the feeling of knowing that I’m expanding my mind and thinking critically about important things. I also love the occasional study groups, because the discussions are so thought provoking and intelligent. Maybe it’s just because I have brilliant friends, but our conversations during those times never ceased to amaze me.

So I guess I will just have to keep my mind off of those things today, because I need to be happy, not sad, when going onto this fierce bowling competition with the church group tonight. It’s pretty important that I feel up to the task of kicking some ass. I’ve got to talk some serious game, here…because we all know I’m the world’s worst bowler.

Anyway–Here is Autumn in Rosenheim, as I sit on the back porch, reading Portia de Rossi’s Unbearable Lightness: